All Purpose

So I’ve done it. I took the first step and gave notice at my job yesterday. While I am a little nervous about what the future holds, I am also relieved beyond belief that my time here is coming to an end in 3.5 weeks.

I will be taking a break from work for 6 months and then I will figure out what I want to do. What will I do in the meantime though? I will read, cook, bake, write, garden, knit, do yoga, run, walk, swim, rest and hopefully heal.

Wish me luck!

2 Comments | In: 9to5 | tags: job, moving on, quit. | #

So today is the day that I start preparing to get out of the way, which is just another way of saying quit my job. Today I sat in a meeting and heard how many positions our area has lost and how hard it’s going to be to replace anyone. It makes me feel bad. It makes me feel guilty that I want to leave at this, the worst time.

I know the organization won’t die without me, and in fact if they can hire a replacement then that person might really flourish where I have only floundered.

I guess I’m feeling a little like I’m giving up, or that I’ve failed.

So now I need to give some thought to my project in progress and figure out, what needs to be done to ensure the project is continued and what can I leave behind?

Also, I really wish I had not agreed to speak at TLA this year. I wonder if I can wiggle out of it…

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So I made gumbo this past weekend for the first time in like 5 years. It was ok, but I had just totally forgotten how I used to do it. I never had a recipe I used, so piecing it back together was a little rough. It was good though and now I’d like to (re)master that recipe so I’ll probably be experimenting with that over the fall and winter.

I will work on getting a better kitchen photo set up too so I can start documenting these kitchen forays a little better.

In other news I’m feeling ready to finally start running again (yes!). I’m going to start the Couch to 5K program next Monday. I’ll be starting NaNoWriMo on Sunday as well so November is going to be hectic for me. Wish me luck, and I’ll try to keep the blog somewhat updated.

I’ll be doing a knitting update later this week!

No Comments | In: 9to5, life, running | tags: 9to5, cooking, running, writing. | #

So I decided that I should merge the blogs and since knitter’s lib is where I’m posting the most I’m keeping it and merging in the content from the little hour (which I wasn’t posting in much anyway). So now this will be about more than knitting, but I guess it kind of was anyway, it’ll just be more obvious now.

So I imported all TLH posts and I’ll probably blow TLH away later this week and then maybe I can do a real index page for my site since I seem to have lost it.

So things are rough right now and I’m doing all this damn thinking. Thinking about life and death and goals and what I want to be when I grow up. It’s tiring, and sometimes depressing and for me full of ups and downs. One minute I think I should open a bakery or some kind of baking related business, the next I think no I need a legal job, then I think why did I stop writing-I should write. Today I realized I miss school (wtf?) but maybe I don’t miss school maybe what I miss are things like real writing workshops. I miss writing but it’s hard to schedule it in a day already full of work, marriage, pet care, family care, self care… Well you get the picture; my head is a mess right now.

Despite all this mental wrestling which is making me think more probably, I’m still depressed a bit. I still can’t manage to get the exercise routine down. I have kept my spending lent for 1.5 months now (woot) and I’m slowly getting my financial stuff more organized. I think I just do to a budget and maintain my weekly bookkeeping and I’m good. The spending lent is making me think more about every dime I spend and I think this habit will hopefully stick past the actual lent.

The garden which I promised would happen this year is so not going to happen unless a miracle happens this weekend. I want to drink beer and read all weekend so I’m not seeing that happening. Oh well, there’s always next year right?

No Comments | In: 9to5, life | tags: blogs, death, dreams, goals, jobs, thinking, writing. | #

I’m feeling blah today. I am supposed to go to my core class tonight for running. [For those wondering what the hell that means, it means being tortured for an hour by a super-fit runner who wants us to do leg and ab work-HELL, but kind of fun hell.] I want to go, but I don’t want to go. I guess the weather is crappy, and my allergies suck, and I’m alone again this week. I think this might be a regular problem though since I didn’t really want to go last week either, I guess the M-W crazy work/work-out schedule is a bit tiring. I know I’ll adjust to it, but right now I’m sooooo tired and the cedar fever shit doesn’t help.

I’m also feeling kind of blah about work lately too. I should be excited, I’m starting a new project, new software, etc. But I’m not. I no longer take pleasure in any of my work really. I have brief flashes of excitement, but nothing like how I used to feel about my job. I can’t figure out if it’s the time of year, getting married or just that really I am done with this job. *sigh*

In fun news though, we got some new furniture (pics to follow) last weekend. I’ll show it off later. I ordered M. a MacBook Air (MBA) today. It looks pretty sweet, and hopefully I’ll get to use it once in a while too. I was quite disappointed that no new iPhone was announced though. I really want one, but I want to hold out for 3G, so hurry up Steve Jobs and get me a 3G iPhone, sheesh.

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I have the blahs. I don’t know if it’s because the weather can’t settle, or just that I’m in need of some r&r or what, but I do not want to work.

Ever since I transferred to the new job I’ve gone through periods of high productively and something bordering on the passion I once felt for my job, and the blahs. Part of me is really excited that they think I’m so good at implementing new software that they picked me to be the project manager for our new ERM. Then the cynical part of me wonders if they are setting me up to fail. Really I don’t believe I’ll fail because I think I’m realistic in my expectations of what the software can do, but are they?

The other thing that has me down is the whole admin of the library is fucking dysfunctional it’s ridiculous and I’ve been there 6 years now and I honestly don’t think the way things work is going to change until all the upper admin retires and most of the middle management too. I don’t see myself waiting around for that in the hopes that the libraries will become a magically fairyland of forward thinking.

So anyway, it’s close to the xmas break (1 week, 5 days) so my motivation is low and I’ll probably spend the day catching up on knitting blogs and feverishly hoping to get my ravelry invite (which I’m estimating I’ll actually get the week of xmas). Maybe I’ll work on my morbid past time (more on that later).

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So I know I said like a year ago that I was back and that I’d be posting and blah, blah, blah. Then I didn’t post and I wasn’t really back. Well I have a good explanation, I swear. So here’s what I did on my long blogging hiatus:

So, see a very busy year+ for me. I’m done with the wedding stuff though and work is slightly less stressful now. I’m back to crafting (see knitter’s lib), and trying to get myself back into the running habit which I miss (but I’m naturally lazy so even though I like running it’s hard).

I really am going to try to write in this and my knitting blog on a regular basis though, really.

No Comments | In: 9to5, mahwage, whatever | | #